I do confide in my eldest son quite a bit I think because I don’t have a partner living with me. I lean on him like I might a husband at least as far as figuring out certain household issues or other life matters are concerned. And he is deliberate in his thinking and analysis and very considerate in his responses.
I said to Kailen even this evening that there are three people in my life right now that if something happened to them and they were taken away from my life that I would feel I could not live without them. Kailen said, “Well mom that tells if you are really in love with someone. It is the In Love Litmus Test.” And as we rode on through space I thought to myself about that for a moment. And I said but I know I love so many other people but could somehow live on without them and how is that possible. I then became aware that it is because of the clinging my mind and heart have to those three. I am fixed on them like they are my true north. And that may be the definition of true love but it is also the definition of fixation. We both agreed and rode on.
Our ride ended with that thought and I poured myself a martini and continued sitting in the quiet of this stunningly close July evening.